a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Randomize
