i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize