was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
