Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
