It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
