had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
