She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
