I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
