The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I want to fling myself into the sun
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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