allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
