we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
