He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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