found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
