They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
