Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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