I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize