I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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