Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
be right there i have to get my cape
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
