that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize