Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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