are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
