bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Dicks are not precious.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
