I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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