am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
