I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
