No awkward lesbian experiences without me
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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