How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Who died my cat blue again?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
