a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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