I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
