Define "chronic" masturbator.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Welp...herpes.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
