Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
She said her name was "party"
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize