you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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