I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Randomize
