the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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