Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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