So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
