We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
