I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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