Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize