it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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