Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Randomize
