so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
meet me or not, i'm out of control
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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