He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
