She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
