don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
