he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
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