would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
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