yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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