We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
