I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
